Until Death Do Us Part #2

After some extended thought about the first post I wrote about marriage, I want to clarify my sense of what is true for me. Most of the marriages I have performed have been occasions of the holy. Love when present in these circumstances is truly a divine reality. The one or two ceremonies that I have officiated that were “lacking” in this loving ingredient most probably went off because of my inability or neglect. And, hopefully this is something that I have become better at recognizing and dealing with as my experience in ministry has grown.

My intention in the previous post was not to imply that ALL same gender marriages are pure with regard to intention or outcome, but rather that same gender couples should have the right and opportunity to live into loving relationships that are recognized as legitimate by the church and state. My best hope for any couple I marry is a committed, lasting relationship.



Until “death do us part”

Over the past two years, I have been privileged to officiate at 3 same gender weddings–which are legal now in New York state. Adding them up together the couples have had over 35 years –in relationship with each other– before marriage. (This stat is a bit skewed by the couple who had been together 28.)

In all these ceremonies–including the planning and rehearsing–the presence of the Divine in the love reflected by the couples has been real, palpable, powerful,  and AMAZING. I wish this were true in 100 percent of all the other weddings I’ve officiated.